Thankful Heart

Thankful Heart
By Joe Chacon

I sit here wondering what I can accomplish
What are my limits, and what are my restraints?
Am I holding back or am I asking for too much?
We need to go forward, stay motivated, and try our luck.

I need to find the path I am to follow
And leave it all on the table
Dig deep and find that passion
The passion that will take me places, the places that are slipping away.

You’ve given me this life
The life I’m thankful for everyday
But this life you’ve given me
What do you expect me to pay?

How lucky are we for what you have given us
How thankful we should be for the opportunities that we have
But I have one question
One that I’ve always had

For those that never had a relationship with him
For those who never had the chance
Is he taking care of them?
Or is he taking a firm stance?

I believe he is forgiving
And he forgives those with a good heart
I’m thankful you are there for me, even when I fall.
I’m just thankful for everything, I’m thankful for it all

Video Games – Hobby or Collection?

I remember being 8 years old and my Uncle Mike was holed up in his bedroom playing “WWF Wrestling” on his Nintendo.  Now, this was 1988 and any image the you were able to control on screen was amazing. I remember asking if I could play and he would zone me out or he would hand be a controller that wasn’t plugged in (I didn’t figure this out until later). I would look forward to watching him play in hopes that I would get 20 seconds on the controller myself. This would normally happen if he had to go get something to drink, or if the phone rang or something. I was enamored by this Nintendo and I knew right away it was something I was always going to enjoy. I still remember walking through a grocery store shortly after that with my Mom, Dad, or Grandma and talking to Kenny about video games. It’s crazy how clear I remember this, I was standing my the meat section wearing white shoes and my exact words to my brother were, “When I get older I’m going to spend all of my money on video games. ” Completely oblivious to the fact that there were other expenses awaiting me.

So, here we are 18 years later, and I still feel the same way about these damn games. In November ‘06 I was lucky enough to come across a Nintendo Wii. Then at the end of the year I impulsively got a Playstation 3. After that buy, I thought to myself, “Okay, that’s it, these are the two systems I will own for this generation (until the next wave of new systems).” I mean, enough is enough, right? It wasn’t too long ago that I had my Playstation 2 and only purchased about 5 games a year, and that got rid of my gaming itch. 

I guess it wasn’t enough. This past Friday, I found a great deal on an XBOX 360 and put the pieces in place to buy this system, and it should be here sometime this week. Why did I do this? It’s a weird feeling, kind of like when you collect baseball cards and you just need another card to complete the set, or a stamp collector, or anybody who collects anything. What it all comes down to is that I had the itch that I needed to completed the set (PS3, Wii, 360).

Collection is Complete

So now what? I’m not a kid anymore, I have responsibilities and I take them seriously. I work full time, I go to school full time, I have a wife I love to be with, and I have a beautiful 2 year old daughter that melts my heart with every smile, where do I find the time for this hobby/collection? Well, you know late at night when the world is asleep and the only sounds you hear outside your window are the few distant cars passing by? That’s typically when I’m recouping from the day, on the couch, and mimicking what I first saw 18 years ago.

Happy Birthday, Grandma

I remember when I was about 10 years old (maybe younger), and my Grandma Rose would call me and sing the chorus from a famous Stevie Wonder song:

“I just called to say I love you”

It was so great to hear my Grandma’s voice then, but I would give just about anything to hear her voice one more time.

It’s been 11 months since my Grandma’s passing, and I’m pretty sure it’s going to take at least 11 more for it to really sink in that she’s not here. I’ve been through all the phases of grief. I’ve been sad, I’ve been angry, and I’m currently in denial. The final stage, and the one I haven’t completely finished, is accepting that she’s gone. Maybe because it happened so fast.

Last year at this time I was able to call my Grandma and wish her a happy birthday. The prognosis wasn’t good for her, but everything that the docs were telling us pointed to a recovery. All of a sudden things went downhill and poof she is gone. Life is cynical like that, I suppose.

Well, I have faith in God, faith in Heaven, and my faith allows me to know that without a doubt that my Grandma is happy and will continue to watch over me and my family as we go through life.

Grandma, I love you, Happy Birthday!

Happy Mother’s Day!

It’s Mother’s Day morning and I’m going through the same memories as I do every Mother’s Day. I think of my Mom and how hard she tries to make everyone happy. How she gets back up no matter how many times she’s put in a difficult situation, and how she has always been the one person who has supported anything I’ve ever done. I think of my emotions and the way I appear physically, and I see the resemblance in my Mom in everything that I do. Every year I make the promise to go visit her once a month, and every year it seems 6 months fly by before I finally get up to SLO.

Mom, I’m so thankful for you and everything that you do, and not only for myself but for my brother, all my sisters, and even Bella too. You do more than you give yourself credit for.

Happy Mothers Day!!!

We Love You!!!

Mom w/Bella in July ‘05

Behind the Scenes

Believe it or not, Bella is really editing all the videos I take credit for.